What happened to Yesterday?

Today, for this new day I was looking for hope and new way to find God and serve God and hear God. But the sky was so gray, I just wanted to stay in bed and tell the world to go away while I wonder what happened to yesterday. When I could see hope for myself, be hope for someone else. When I felt free to go to those gates of hell and warn the people there of the danger within, this thing called sin which is their free ticket to go through the gates and never be seen again. I felt the fire inside me, there to cleanse and guide me telling me which way and what to say. It was a bright day. But now it seems just a spark. Barely enough to feel in my own heart, much less to emerge this day victorious. Why can't I seem to believe that He is glorious, and not against, but for us? I can't imagine I will ever see fruit. Is it really the truth? What is the truth? Where is its root? In my own perception? Or is that just deception? Right now what can I say except what happened to yesterday? I saw the future so near that if I just believed it would be here before I would realize it, now so many things disguise it and I can't find where I went wrong. O God how I long to do the things that made you strong as I read in your Word how you would speak and those who heard would no longer be disturbed by the things they have done that they have tried to outrun but no matter how hard they try it finds them in the blink of an eye and all they can do is cry for the innocence lost they want back no matter the cost and here you come Lord with a crazy proclamation: that You are the name by which we have salvation. In their hearts is now this anticipation of something great but is it really worth putting your faith in something so crazy? They think, maybe, just maybe I won't be let down this time so with their heart they find the One who is knocking but can barely be heard because of the junk that is blocking the power of His voice. But then, the Choice. The angels in heaven declare that another has been rescued from the snare and powers of darkness beware: this one no longer lives in your lair but has been made himself bare to the Lamb of God who took away his shame and spoke to him his true name. Let that news come from my lips that I would see things like this happen in the lives around me, let it be found in me. Then they just might say, what happened to yesterday?